too little time....

Do you ever feel like there are not enough hours in the day to do everything that you'd like to do? I'm sure that everyone has felt this way at least once, and if you haven't then you have far too much time on your hands. I bring this up because there are times that I wish I didn't have to work (as I'm sure that everyone wishes) so that I could actually do the things that I'd like to do. I don't mean sitting in front of a computer/television and playing some mindless game or watching some lame tv program, but something constructive, something new to learn or a talent to hone.

I know this may sound sad, but I purchased a guitar almost three years ago after I got divorced (my ex would never let me have a guitar) and I have been slowly trying to teach myself since. I struggle because sometimes my mind doesn't always wrap around certain things. I have a lot of respect for those guitarists who are self-taught. This year I finally decided to do something about it, I'm going to start taking lessons. When? I'm not sure, but I know that it's something I'm going to do.

I also need to sit down and find time to work on my script(s). I have so many ideas that are constantly brewing in my mind but I get so stuck when I sit down to write. I get frustrated that my words aren't depicting the idea that I have in my head and so I stop. This is something I also need to work on and that is another reason for this blog, to help me formulate my ideas and thoughts to the point where it will flow easier and make more sense when I do write. I'm sure, over time, this blog will read better with less mistakes and grammatical errors. At least I hope so.

Today, my wife and I visited an art studio as we are planning on taking some art classes together. The woman who will be teaching us is an incredible artist and I've known her for years (she's my friends mother). She was in the middle of teaching a class and it was so neat to walk around and see what her students were working on. We also went to visit with her and to talk about getting started, when classes were, etc. and as I looked around, I became slightly jealous of the talent that was in that room. The art in that studio was amazing! I wanted to have that talent now. There was a group of twelve year olds who could paint and draw better then I ever could! It made me think about what I wasted my time on when I was younger and I felt a little disappointed in myself. Curse that damn Playstation! Sometimes I wish the Matrix were true, because then if I wanted to draw like Leonardo, I could have someone just boot some art program into my brain and viola! I can paint a masterpiece. *sigh* Regardless of all that, I am looking very forward to taking classes and hoping that I may show even a smidgen of talent.

My wife and I also planning on starting our own projects that will hopefully evolve into a small business. I get so eager to do it sometimes that I almost can't contain my excitement. I know that I don't always show it on the outside, but inside I'm almost ready to burst with creativity and the ability to get hands on with something. I wish that we could do it right now, but our current living situation and being short on funds tends to hinder us quite a bit. Now, I know that some may say "Where there's a will, they's a way" and that is true, but only to an extent. Sometimes it's just shy of the "way" part even though there is more then enough "will" part.

I guess, in closing, I wish that I could freeze time and focus on the things that I really wish I could do while I was at work. Or I'd love to have Doc Brown on speed dial, call him up and say, "Hey Doc, can I borrow the DeLorean for a bit? There's a few things that I wished I would have focused a bit more on when I was a kid, like really learning how to play the guitar. Oh yeah, I also wanted to make sure that my mom never sold all my Transformers at the yard sale that one summer too."